Full hand(s)

I don't mind typing my paper with one hand, as long as this is what occupies the other!

I am one lucky momma. Happy Tuesday!

Just for today

Can I admit something? I didn't really make any New Year's resolutions. My life has changed so much already this year and we have more big changes coming our way- graduating, moving, etc. so I didn't want to set some unattainable goal for myself and just end up disappointed. I've decided instead to set monthly goals and take life on in smaller chunks. So, my goals for February:

-Eat healthier. I watched "Forks Over Knives" last night- made me think quite a bit. I want to have a better, more plant-based diet. Not that I'm cutting out meat and dairy completely, but I'd like to use it less- the meat that's in my freezer will last me the whole month hopefully. This will require a little creativity and branching out on my part, so I'm excited!

-Journal more consistently. Giselle gave me the "Mom's One Line a Day" journal at my baby shower and I love it! The only problem is that I haven't been doing it every day. So then I go back and try to fill things in, but I know it's not as meaningful when I'm just writing general stuff. This month I will at least write in that every day. And maybe blog a little more too?

-Be better at the little daily things. Scripture study, prayer, etc. Because really, those things aren't little! 

I was reading in the Ensign today and was inspired by this quote: "As we reflect on the value of resolving to do better, let us determine to discipline ourselves to carefully select the resolutions we make, to consider the purpose for making them, and finally to make commitments for keeping them and not letting any obstacle stop us. Let us remind ourselves at the beginning of each day that we can keep a resolution just for that day." I think I tend to make a bigger deal of things than is needed, so I'm just going to take these resolutions one day at a time! February will be awesome!

Vain stuff

Please excuse my vanity.

Tyler's computer recently crashed (it won't even turn on now) and he needed some files off of it for a school project. So he called Ryan for help, and we girls tagged along to visit with Cari, Gabby, and Natalie while they were working on his computer. It was so nice to get out of the house! I got dressed up (and by dressed up, I mean dressed) and put Millie in a cute little outfit, and even did my hair. I totally understand now why "the mom haircut" exists! I'm really itching to cut my hair after yesterday.  I'm sure poor Millie is wishing I would too... my hair kept falling in her face while I was nursing her or holding her. Tyler even said the other day he was looking at pictures from when we were first married (I chopped my hair about a week after our wedding) and he loved my hair short. But I've been growing my hair out for so long! What's a girl to do?

Also, this post-baby body. Doesn't get much more glamorous, right? I heard a lot growing up about pregnancy and the fun body changes that come along with that, but no one ever mentioned how it is after the baby is born. What an adventure. I decided what my body is like the other day- a frumpy version of Pamela Anderson. Or maybe Dolly Parton? I think you get it. I secretly hoped to be one of those people who could wear their pre-pregnancy pants right away... fat chance. Literally. I'm back to using that hair-elastic-around-the-button trick like when I was pregnant. Can't wait to start working out for real again!

But I must say, the fact that I haven't worn my pre-pregnancy clothes in so long makes them appealing again. It's like I have a whole new free wardrobe! Awesome.

Alive

My days and nights are wrapped up in Millie Mae... it's the best! We are officially on our own now and are doing pretty well, though I definitely miss having the dishes and dinner "magically" done. I feel like Millie is so different from when she was born already! She had her 2-week appointment on Friday and did great- didn't even cry when they poked her heel again. The doctor gave her a gold star for weight gain- she gained a pound and an ounce! So now she's 9 lbs 4 oz! Our little chunker. 

Millie's had lots of people come by to meet her- she is one loved little girl! I randomly took a picture when Steph and Andrew brought their kids by as they were passing through.

I still think one of my favorite things about having Millie here is watching Tyler interact with her. He is a great dad... Millie's got him wrapped around her little finger already!

Some other random pictures:

All ready for her doctor's appointment. She LOVES her carseat!

Seriously, those cheeks? I could kiss them all day.

Millie's birth

Since Millie is two weeks old today, it's probably about time I sit down to record the story of her birth! I still can't believe she's here. We feel so blessed that she and I are both healthy and that everything went well.

So I had been having contractions for a long time- for a few weeks, really. My mom arrived in town on January 2, since we were all thinking Peanut would come early. We cleaned and made meals and got things ready for a few days, waiting semi-patiently. I kind of felt like there was a bomb we were all waiting for to go off, and it was me! :) It was a weird feeling waiting. My sister Kim and her son Sam also came down for a couple days so they could see my mom since we didn't have a baby yet. It was a party!

On Friday the 5th we went up to Sandy to a wholesale fabric store and chose some fabric for our Christmas PJs for next year! I started to notice that I was having more frequent contractions as we were walking around, but I wouldn't let myself get excited about anything-- I had decided days ago that I wouldn't start paying attention to or timing them until they demanded my full attention. So we went about the day-- shopping for fabric and groceries, making dinner, etc. We even got brownies and ice cream to celebrate my birthday (I'd had a cold on my real birthday and couldn't taste anything so we waited on the birthday treats until I could taste again). 

The day I went into labor... Last pregnant picture! Not attractive, but oh well.

After dinner and dessert we played some games-- Ticket to Ride and Yahtzee. It was during the games that I started to time contractions... maybe the fact that my mom beat us all at Ticket to Ride stressed me out enough to put me into labor? I don't know. But the contractions were about every 7 minutes and getting more and more intense. It was painful, but I knew that these contractions were actually doing something so I was really excited! We all went to bed at about 11:30, but no way was I sleeping. Tyler and I watched Prison Break on our laptop in bed until I decided I wanted to get in the tub. He stayed with me and timed contractions. My doctor had said to go to the hospital when they were 5 minutes apart for at least an hour, but at this point I had gone straight from 7 minutes apart to 3! So we finally decided to go to the hospital at about 1 am.

That 5 block car ride to the hospital was one of the most painful of my life! I had stayed pretty calm until then, but I definitely cried on our way there. We got all checked in and settled and they checked me at about 2 am- I was 4 cm dilated. I had been 2.5 cm at my last appointment, so not tons of change. The nurse said if I didn't make about a centimeter of progress in the next hour they'd send me home to labor on my own for a while longer. That was a long hour, spent contracting and praying that I was contracting enough to stay there! :) Tyler got me some flavored ice chips- Tiger's Blood, which reminded me of my Sno-Shack days. Awesome. The nurse checked me again and I was a "good 5." Hallelujah! 

So we settled in. We watched Cake Boss and a House marathon on TV and tried to sleep between contractions, tried being the key word for me. I made pretty good progress, probably a centimeter an hour, until I hit 8 cm. Things kind of slowed down as far as contracting and dilating goes (not as far as pain goes, unfortunately), so at that point I decided to get an epidural, probably at about 6 am. I'm glad I did because things didn't pick back up on their own, and they started some pitocin after a while. To be honest, I didn't really like the epidural. I liked not feeling the pain, but I didn't like the way it made me feel, or the fact that I had no control over my legs.  Or the fact that my nurse dropped my leg a few times? Kind of weird. We were still watching House and sleeping off and on, but after a while of being on pitocin Millie's heart rate started to drop a little too much for our liking. They put me on some oxygen and took me off the pitocin, and luckily Millie's heart rate improved after a while and the contractions didn't slow down, so that was a relief.

Reminiscent of my breathing treatment days as a child!

 I finally got to 10 cm at about 1 pm. The nurses who were there when we first arrived all thought she would be here by 8 am! So we were all so excited when I was fully dilated. The doctor told me to rest for another hour so I had some energy and Millie could keep moving down on her own. 

I finally started to push at about 2:10 pm! It was a little surreal. They had the doctor there at the beginning because Millie was face up and they wanted to try and turn her over to make the delivery easier. The doctor said Millie was shaking her head- she did not want to turn! But she eventually turned and I kept pushing and the doctor left. After about 20 minutes of pushing they called the doctor back in- I guess she was moving down pretty well. I kept pushing while we waited but after a little bit they had me stop and we waited some more. The doctor finally came and a few minutes later so did Millie!  Her left hand came out with her head, making things interesting, but it turned out fine. She came!

We have been so lucky to have both our moms come and help! My mom stayed with us until the 11th, and Gretchen arrived the 11th and stayed until the 18th! Thanks again to both of them for their help, and to our dads for letting their wives leave for so long. 

Fatherhood looks so good on him!

First family picture

What surprised me the most was how I felt that I knew her already when I saw her for the first time! We felt so much love for her instantly and were so glad that she was finally here and healthy. Millie Mae has the most kissable cheeks on the planet and is a great eater. She's a super calm and low maintenance baby! When we can get the message across that day is day and night is night we will be glad. We love her so much!

Introducing

Millie Mae Juergens

born January 6, 2012 at 3:26 pm.

8 lbs, 3 oz. 21.5" long

She is the sweetest thing ever and we are just smitten with her!

More pictures to come!